Tuesday, March 22, 2005
Desparate Idiots
The girl-next-door is still good fodder for the male fantasy (always has been, always will be) but the girl-next-door’s mother is fast becoming a favorite wet-dream as well.
I think that there are several reason for this including (a) an expansion within the mind set of North American men and women to find sexy those people who are healthy and happy (rather than sweaty and anorexic), (b) a shift in population demographics that has created a lot of demand for maturity, and (c) the fact that, as fantasy-fodder, a desperate housewife has an edge over a picky playboy bunny.
The fact of the matter is that the sex objects we see in the main stream media are aging.
The fact of the matter is that the sex objects we see in the main stream media are aging.
What seems absolutely ludicrous to me is that people seem surprised by this.
For example, my 61 year old mother saw the movie Calendar Girls and thought it was wonderful. She thought that it was particularly wonderful because the movie dealt with older women as sexual subjects (or objects). She was happily surprised that we, as a society, were coming so far forward in our appreciation of more mature women.
But perhaps my mother, an avid avoider of all things current, is not a good example. A better example would be the editorial in yesterday’s newspaper's television-supplement in which the author claimed surprise at the growing list of older women who are making it into mainstream television. The editor in question cited Glen Close, Farah Fawcett, Murphy Brown and the main cast of Desperate Housewives as evidence that in his opinion, quite suddenly, we are seeing older women get acting roles as attractive older women (Apparently the Golden Girls and Murder She Wrote support the theory of change).
Sure, this phenomena may have recently hit TV, but where did this change come from and how long has it actually been with us?
I think the answers to both these questions can be found, at least in part, with Internet Pornography.
The fantasy of a younger man with an older woman (for both the young men and the older women) has been around since there were young men and older women. It should come as no surprise to anyone (least of all an editor for a television supplement) that, despite the fact they are all pushing 40(at least), the women of the television program Desperate Housewives would be popular as sex symbols. Boys have probably been fantasizing about the cute mom living next door since there have been mom’s living next door. There are countless of media examples over the years that portray this kind of thing. The Graduate (Ann Bancroft and Dustin Hoffman in 1967) is a prime example. However, we do appear to be currently seeing a bubble of the sexual appeal of the mature woman in the main stream media (i.e. television and film).
Moreover, people do seem to be remarking on this trend with mild surprise when, if they had been paying attention to the growing number of porn sites dedicated to the mature woman, there would be no surprise at all.
Of course Desperate Housewives is weak as an example for my point (Desperate Housewives is a weak example of any point). After all, the women of this show (excepting the one they killed a few episodes ago) are hardly representative of the average physique for their age group. Hell, they are hardly representative of the average physique of women of any age. They are slim, fit and sexy women no matter how old they are and it would be wrong to suggest that male attraction to these women is based solely on their ages.
For that reason I am not going to suggest that the attraction is based solely on their ages. I am, however, going to suggest that part of the attraction men have for these women is based on their ages.
Anyone who has read the book Boom, Bust and Echo by David K. Foot (MacFarlane Walter and Ross, 1996) could predict that, as the “baby boomers” get older, so too will their taste in “sexy”. Nor, with seniors being the fastest growing demographic on the internet, is it difficult to imagine that the age of models depicted as “sexy” might be on the rise as well. After all, while 45 may seem old and wrinkled when you are a horny adolescent, it probably seems damn fine and spry when you are pushing eighty. More importantly, I think that 45 is starting to seem damn fine to contemporary adolescents as well.
For one thing, health is becoming attractive on its own regardless of “body type”. Oh, sure, during the Eighties it was all about what you actually looked like and there is still great appeal for the “perfectly” shaped Playboy model (and, for some reason that escapes me, the borderline anorexic teenager too). However, there seems to currently be a huge demand for “healthy” and “happy” as sexy, and this demand transcends the supposedly "ideal" body type.
For example, my 61 year old mother saw the movie Calendar Girls and thought it was wonderful. She thought that it was particularly wonderful because the movie dealt with older women as sexual subjects (or objects). She was happily surprised that we, as a society, were coming so far forward in our appreciation of more mature women.
But perhaps my mother, an avid avoider of all things current, is not a good example. A better example would be the editorial in yesterday’s newspaper's television-supplement in which the author claimed surprise at the growing list of older women who are making it into mainstream television. The editor in question cited Glen Close, Farah Fawcett, Murphy Brown and the main cast of Desperate Housewives as evidence that in his opinion, quite suddenly, we are seeing older women get acting roles as attractive older women (Apparently the Golden Girls and Murder She Wrote support the theory of change).
Sure, this phenomena may have recently hit TV, but where did this change come from and how long has it actually been with us?
I think the answers to both these questions can be found, at least in part, with Internet Pornography.
The fantasy of a younger man with an older woman (for both the young men and the older women) has been around since there were young men and older women. It should come as no surprise to anyone (least of all an editor for a television supplement) that, despite the fact they are all pushing 40(at least), the women of the television program Desperate Housewives would be popular as sex symbols. Boys have probably been fantasizing about the cute mom living next door since there have been mom’s living next door. There are countless of media examples over the years that portray this kind of thing. The Graduate (Ann Bancroft and Dustin Hoffman in 1967) is a prime example. However, we do appear to be currently seeing a bubble of the sexual appeal of the mature woman in the main stream media (i.e. television and film).
Moreover, people do seem to be remarking on this trend with mild surprise when, if they had been paying attention to the growing number of porn sites dedicated to the mature woman, there would be no surprise at all.
Of course Desperate Housewives is weak as an example for my point (Desperate Housewives is a weak example of any point). After all, the women of this show (excepting the one they killed a few episodes ago) are hardly representative of the average physique for their age group. Hell, they are hardly representative of the average physique of women of any age. They are slim, fit and sexy women no matter how old they are and it would be wrong to suggest that male attraction to these women is based solely on their ages.
For that reason I am not going to suggest that the attraction is based solely on their ages. I am, however, going to suggest that part of the attraction men have for these women is based on their ages.
Anyone who has read the book Boom, Bust and Echo by David K. Foot (MacFarlane Walter and Ross, 1996) could predict that, as the “baby boomers” get older, so too will their taste in “sexy”. Nor, with seniors being the fastest growing demographic on the internet, is it difficult to imagine that the age of models depicted as “sexy” might be on the rise as well. After all, while 45 may seem old and wrinkled when you are a horny adolescent, it probably seems damn fine and spry when you are pushing eighty. More importantly, I think that 45 is starting to seem damn fine to contemporary adolescents as well.
For one thing, health is becoming attractive on its own regardless of “body type”. Oh, sure, during the Eighties it was all about what you actually looked like and there is still great appeal for the “perfectly” shaped Playboy model (and, for some reason that escapes me, the borderline anorexic teenager too). However, there seems to currently be a huge demand for “healthy” and “happy” as sexy, and this demand transcends the supposedly "ideal" body type.
Blame it on the social growth of the male and female mind and give credit to the women’s movement whether you want to or not: the fact remains that, while people may not be getting less attracted to the current (basically unattainable) ideal of beauty, they are getting more attracted to people who do not meet the requirements of perfection.
This widening of what the average man will consider beautiful (and I firmly believe that women have always held each other to higher standards than those to which men have held them) transcends such things as body-types.
This widening of what the average man will consider beautiful (and I firmly believe that women have always held each other to higher standards than those to which men have held them) transcends such things as body-types.
It also transcends age.
M.I.L.F.’s (as they are known on the Web), or Moms I’d Like to Fuck, seem to represent an ever larger proportion of the pictures on the Internet (mind you, this is merely a casual observation). Of course, it is easy to see why any straight guy (and maybe some gay ones too) would love the idea of banging away at Terri Hatcher (at least in theory - in practice she’d probably snap like a twig). But a quick scan of the supply of porn out there demonstrates beyond a doubt that not every MILF needs to be a Terry Hatcher look-a-like.
There is a growing demand for healthy looking, normal, middle-aged women among the men out there (at least, there is a growing demand for pictures of them naked). Because of this desire for older models, middle age amateur women (and over-age porn actresses like Nina Hartley) are finding themselves in higher demand. Be it glamour shots in dated lingerie or grainy, poorly lit pictures of some guy's wife taken in the living room, the number of these photos as a percentage of all the photos out there appears to be ballooning rapidly.
A final (and probably the most important) factor, of course, is the all important world of possibility. Call it the bird in the hand factor.
Face it, for practical purposes we can state that zero percent of men are going to get to sleep with Madonna. The fact of the matter is that most guys are just going to keep sleeping with their wives and girlfriends and be thankful for their good fortune. On the other hand, guys (and girls) do like to fantasize and the more real the fantasy is, the easier it is to… well… have a “successful” fantasy. While I believe that men are expanding their horizons regarding the nature of beauty, the added appeal of the less than “perfect” model is that there is some small chance (but at least a chance) that the fantasy could become real.
The appeal lies in this miniscule (possibly only theoretical) but real chance.
Think of it like day-dreaming about traveling on vacation. Most people probably spend a lot more time dreaming about a trip to… say… Greece, then dreaming about.... say … a trip to the moon. This is true even though most of us would agree that (risks removed) the moon would probably be a lot more interesting as a travel destination. The reason Greece is more fun to dream about is that you might actually get to go to Greece one day. Even if you can just never see it happening, it is a real possibility. On the other hand, as facinating a trip as the moon would be, there is simply no way you are ever going to get to vacation on the lunar surface. A moon vacation is still possible, but it is not a real possibility.
Like a trip to the moon, a romantic (probably “romantic” is the wrong word) encounter with Britney Spears is not a real possibility for any men (or, at least, not a real possibility for all but a statistically negligible percentage). On the other hand, a similar encounter with that reasonably attractive 30 or 40 year old woman at the Coffee Shop … well … that could happen. Of course it is not going to happen(we all know that), but that’s not the point, is it? What is important is that it could happen. That is, the event is within the realm of real possibility.
Similarly, middle aged men are not going to get to bump uglies with last month’s Playboy centerfold. They might, however, get to do the deed with the good looking “desperate” housewife who lives next door.
Again, the fact that in real life they won’t actually get to seduce Mrs. Robinson is not important for the male fantasy world. The fact that these housewives are desperate (a double entendre if I ever saw one) is important. The Terry Hatcher’s of TV land are not the ultimate goal. They are, after all, unattainable. What they do, however, is create the scenario into which someone a bit like Terri Hatcher might fit.
From Calendar Girls, to Desperate Housewives, to the romance in Something’s Gotta Give (Jack and Diane, 2003) and the song Stacy’s Mom by Fountains of Wayne (2004): the shift towards more mature women as sexy is not a surprising change in the mainstream media. The mainstream media, in fact, has been pretty slow at catching on to the trend. The chance of meeting a so called “cougar” (i.e. older women who haunt bars looking to pick up younger men for casual sex) has been titillating young men for more than a decade now and porn sites catering to photos of women who might be a real possibility, have been growing steadily since man figured out how to make a picture out of zeros and ones.
And I know. I know. These fantasies have been around longer than that. The Graduate is a prime example of the main stream dealing with a sexy older woman and a younger man and it was filmed almost 40 years ago. More importantly, boys have probably been fantasizing about the cute mom living next door since there have been cute mom’s living next door. There have been countless media examples over the years that portray this kind of thing. What I am saying however, is that we are seeing a bubble of it in the main stream media right now. What I am saying is that people are acting surprised when, if they were paying attention to the growing number of porn sites dedicated to the Mom Next Door, there would be no surprise at all.
What I am saying is that porn can be a predictor of upcoming trends in the main stream media.
I know it is weak. It is just an observation. I have not done a scientific study or anything.
Jeeesh!
So, what is the next trend in Main Stream Media? Well, based on an informal survey of growing porn topics (and since kiddie porn is, thank god, still illegal), my guess would have to be transexuality. We are starting to see a bit of it late night on odd channels like Showcase now but I foresee a series of movies and television programs dealing with this topic before the end of the decade. Neither will these contain the tame androgyny of Bosom Buddies (Tom Hanks, circa 1980). We are talking about shows with some sexy…. well…. transgendered people to add to our long list of all things beautiful (and acceptable).
M.I.L.F.’s (as they are known on the Web), or Moms I’d Like to Fuck, seem to represent an ever larger proportion of the pictures on the Internet (mind you, this is merely a casual observation). Of course, it is easy to see why any straight guy (and maybe some gay ones too) would love the idea of banging away at Terri Hatcher (at least in theory - in practice she’d probably snap like a twig). But a quick scan of the supply of porn out there demonstrates beyond a doubt that not every MILF needs to be a Terry Hatcher look-a-like.
There is a growing demand for healthy looking, normal, middle-aged women among the men out there (at least, there is a growing demand for pictures of them naked). Because of this desire for older models, middle age amateur women (and over-age porn actresses like Nina Hartley) are finding themselves in higher demand. Be it glamour shots in dated lingerie or grainy, poorly lit pictures of some guy's wife taken in the living room, the number of these photos as a percentage of all the photos out there appears to be ballooning rapidly.
A final (and probably the most important) factor, of course, is the all important world of possibility. Call it the bird in the hand factor.
Face it, for practical purposes we can state that zero percent of men are going to get to sleep with Madonna. The fact of the matter is that most guys are just going to keep sleeping with their wives and girlfriends and be thankful for their good fortune. On the other hand, guys (and girls) do like to fantasize and the more real the fantasy is, the easier it is to… well… have a “successful” fantasy. While I believe that men are expanding their horizons regarding the nature of beauty, the added appeal of the less than “perfect” model is that there is some small chance (but at least a chance) that the fantasy could become real.
The appeal lies in this miniscule (possibly only theoretical) but real chance.
Think of it like day-dreaming about traveling on vacation. Most people probably spend a lot more time dreaming about a trip to… say… Greece, then dreaming about.... say … a trip to the moon. This is true even though most of us would agree that (risks removed) the moon would probably be a lot more interesting as a travel destination. The reason Greece is more fun to dream about is that you might actually get to go to Greece one day. Even if you can just never see it happening, it is a real possibility. On the other hand, as facinating a trip as the moon would be, there is simply no way you are ever going to get to vacation on the lunar surface. A moon vacation is still possible, but it is not a real possibility.
Like a trip to the moon, a romantic (probably “romantic” is the wrong word) encounter with Britney Spears is not a real possibility for any men (or, at least, not a real possibility for all but a statistically negligible percentage). On the other hand, a similar encounter with that reasonably attractive 30 or 40 year old woman at the Coffee Shop … well … that could happen. Of course it is not going to happen(we all know that), but that’s not the point, is it? What is important is that it could happen. That is, the event is within the realm of real possibility.
Similarly, middle aged men are not going to get to bump uglies with last month’s Playboy centerfold. They might, however, get to do the deed with the good looking “desperate” housewife who lives next door.
Again, the fact that in real life they won’t actually get to seduce Mrs. Robinson is not important for the male fantasy world. The fact that these housewives are desperate (a double entendre if I ever saw one) is important. The Terry Hatcher’s of TV land are not the ultimate goal. They are, after all, unattainable. What they do, however, is create the scenario into which someone a bit like Terri Hatcher might fit.
From Calendar Girls, to Desperate Housewives, to the romance in Something’s Gotta Give (Jack and Diane, 2003) and the song Stacy’s Mom by Fountains of Wayne (2004): the shift towards more mature women as sexy is not a surprising change in the mainstream media. The mainstream media, in fact, has been pretty slow at catching on to the trend. The chance of meeting a so called “cougar” (i.e. older women who haunt bars looking to pick up younger men for casual sex) has been titillating young men for more than a decade now and porn sites catering to photos of women who might be a real possibility, have been growing steadily since man figured out how to make a picture out of zeros and ones.
And I know. I know. These fantasies have been around longer than that. The Graduate is a prime example of the main stream dealing with a sexy older woman and a younger man and it was filmed almost 40 years ago. More importantly, boys have probably been fantasizing about the cute mom living next door since there have been cute mom’s living next door. There have been countless media examples over the years that portray this kind of thing. What I am saying however, is that we are seeing a bubble of it in the main stream media right now. What I am saying is that people are acting surprised when, if they were paying attention to the growing number of porn sites dedicated to the Mom Next Door, there would be no surprise at all.
What I am saying is that porn can be a predictor of upcoming trends in the main stream media.
I know it is weak. It is just an observation. I have not done a scientific study or anything.
Jeeesh!
So, what is the next trend in Main Stream Media? Well, based on an informal survey of growing porn topics (and since kiddie porn is, thank god, still illegal), my guess would have to be transexuality. We are starting to see a bit of it late night on odd channels like Showcase now but I foresee a series of movies and television programs dealing with this topic before the end of the decade. Neither will these contain the tame androgyny of Bosom Buddies (Tom Hanks, circa 1980). We are talking about shows with some sexy…. well…. transgendered people to add to our long list of all things beautiful (and acceptable).
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